Getting older!

Repairing Hearts & Getting Older 


A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.

The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.

The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic... 

"Try doing it with the engine running."






A distraught senior citizen


phoned her doctor's office.


"Is it true," she wanted to know,


"that the medication


you prescribed has to be taken


for the rest of my life?"


"'Yes, I'm afraid so,"' the doctor told her.


There was a moment of silence


before the senior lady replied,


"I'm wondering, then,


just how serious is my condition


because this prescription is marked








An older gentleman was


on the operating table


awaiting surgery


and he insisted that his son,


a renowned surgeon,


perform the operation.


As he was about to get the anesthesia,


he asked to speak to his son.


"Yes, Dad, what is it?"


"Don't be nervous, son;


do your best,


and just remember,


if it doesn't go well,


if something happens to me,


your mother


is going to come and


live with you and your wife...."








Eventually you will reach a point


when you stop lying about your age


and start bragging about it. This is so true. I love


to hear them say "you don't look that old.."






The older we get,


the fewer things


seem worth waiting in line for.




Some people


try to turn back their odometers.


Not me!


I want people to know why


I look this way.


I've traveled a long way


and some of the roads weren't paved.






When you are dissatisfied


and would like to go back to youth,


think of Algebra.






You know you are getting old when


everything either dries up or leaks.






One of the many things


no one tells you about aging


is that it is such a nice change


from being young.






Ah, being young is beautiful,


but being old is comfortable.






First you forget names,


then you forget faces.


Then you forget to pull up your zipper....


it's worse when


you forget to pull it down.






(And this final one especially for me,)




keep Your arm around my shoulder


and Your hand over my mouth!"




Now, if you feel this doesn't apply to you . . . stick around awhile . . . it will!