Getting older!

Repairing Hearts & Getting Older 

 

A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.

The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.

The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic... 

"Try doing it with the engine running."

 

***********************************************

 

 

 

A distraught senior citizen

 

phoned her doctor's office.

 

"Is it true," she wanted to know,

 

"that the medication

 

you prescribed has to be taken

 

for the rest of my life?"

 

"'Yes, I'm afraid so,"' the doctor told her.

 

There was a moment of silence

 

before the senior lady replied,

 

"I'm wondering, then,

 

just how serious is my condition

 

because this prescription is marked

 

'NO REFILLS'."

 

***********************

 

 

 

An older gentleman was

 

on the operating table

 

awaiting surgery

 

and he insisted that his son,

 

a renowned surgeon,

 

perform the operation.

 

As he was about to get the anesthesia,

 

he asked to speak to his son.

 

"Yes, Dad, what is it?"

 

"Don't be nervous, son;

 

do your best,

 

and just remember,

 

if it doesn't go well,

 

if something happens to me,

 

your mother

 

is going to come and

 

live with you and your wife...."

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Aging:

 

Eventually you will reach a point

 

when you stop lying about your age

 

and start bragging about it. This is so true. I love

 

to hear them say "you don't look that old.."

 

---------------------------------

 

 

 

The older we get,

 

the fewer things

 

seem worth waiting in line for.

 

---------------------------------

 

Some people

 

try to turn back their odometers.

 

Not me!

 

I want people to know why

 

I look this way.

 

I've traveled a long way

 

and some of the roads weren't paved.

 

********************

 

 

 

When you are dissatisfied

 

and would like to go back to youth,

 

think of Algebra.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

You know you are getting old when

 

everything either dries up or leaks.

 

 

 

-------------------------------

 

One of the many things

 

no one tells you about aging

 

is that it is such a nice change

 

from being young.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

 

 

Ah, being young is beautiful,

 

but being old is comfortable.

 

*********

 

 

 

First you forget names,

 

then you forget faces.

 

Then you forget to pull up your zipper....

 

it's worse when

 

you forget to pull it down.

 

````````````````

 

 

 

(And this final one especially for me,)

 

"Lord,

 

keep Your arm around my shoulder

 

and Your hand over my mouth!"

 

 

 

Now, if you feel this doesn't apply to you . . . stick around awhile . . . it will!